Better Physician Life coaching

The Automatic Yes: The Hidden Habit Behind Physician Burnout | Ep64

You told yourself this month would be different. You would leave on time. You would get home before everyone else had already eaten. Then the MA called in sick, a patient needed to be squeezed in, and one more question caught you at the door. An hour later you were still there, having never consciously decided to stay.

In this episode of Better Physician Life, Dr. Michael Hersh examines the pattern so many physicians live inside without realizing it: the automatic yes. It is not a lack of discipline or a failure to care about your priorities. It is the slow transformation of responsiveness from a professional strength into an identity—and eventually into an expectation you place on yourself.

Drawing on the chocolate milk metaphor first introduced in Episode 3, the cardiac concept that diastole is not optional, and real coaching conversations, Dr. Hersh shows how medicine rewards availability until the very act of choosing disappears. He explores why cutting hours alone often fails, how “little moments” of attention accumulate into a life of leftovers for the people who matter most, and why the most powerful intervention is often simply learning to notice the yes that forms before you’ve even finished hearing the request.

This episode is not another lecture on boundaries. It is an invitation to recover choice, one automatic yes at a time.

Episode Mentioned:

Episode 3: The Myth Of Work-Life Balance 

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About the Show:

Created for physicians who want more than clinical competence, Better Physician Life is a space for honest reflection, reinvention, and reclaiming purpose beyond the pager.

Hosted by Dr. Michael Hersh, each episode dives into the questions we didn’t learn to ask in training, offering tools and conversations to help you live and lead with intention.

Three Actionable Takeaways: 

  1. Notice the Automatic Yes Before You Answer: Catch the moment your response is already forming. Do not force an immediate “no.” Simply observe how quickly the yes appears. Awareness is the first interruption of the reflex.

  2. Ask the Question the Dashboard Cannot Answer: Instead of “Can I make this work?” ask “What is this costing me?” Logistics and capacity are not the same as cost. The latter is what actually determines whether the yes is worth it.
  3. Treat Rest as Part of the Cycle, Not a Reward: Diastole is not optional. Rest does not appear after everything else is finished. Fewer clinical hours don't automatically mean more recovery if your mind stays on call. Protect the conditions that allow you to actually fill.

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If you've found yourself answering the message, staying late, or taking on one more thing before you've really decided whether you want to, you're not alone.  

Medicine rewards physicians for being dependable, and over time it can become difficult to tell the difference between what's actually required and what we've simply gotten used to doing.

A physician coaching session gives you space to step back, notice where the automatic yes is showing up in your work and life, and decide more intentionally what deserves your time and attention. If you're ready to have that conversation, use the link below to schedule a call.

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